Thoughts

Timothy is trying to hide from the camera.

These three playing together....priceless!

I love this wrap!! I can have both hands free.

I originally wanted to title this post "Confessions" but I am not quite sure that is the best title. There is really nothing to confess just wanting to share my thoughts or heart with you. Life with 5 kiddos is really a house full of "I don't know what will happen next" for me. I know with all my being that God has given each one of these little blessings to me and I can't begin to imagine life with out them. Bryan and I are so blessed with 5 children. I feel that the Lord is doing a great work in my life through my children and that He has given each one for a reason. With baby #5 here, I believe that God is trying to help me be a little more laid back. If you know me at all you know that I would love for my house to be in order and all my ducks in a row every day. Guess what...with 5 kiddos under the age of 10 I am beginning to realize that that is NOT going to happen (i.e. I need to be more laid back). Don't get me wrong I think that my house needs to be presentable and decent but I am coming to realize that my children and our relationship is much more valuable than a spotless house. I can't take a clean house to heaven with me but I can take my children. So I need to focus more on my relationship with them and be intentional in leading them to the Lord and quit being so task oriented. You see, with my children I am making an investment in eternity. I will admit that it has been a big adjustment with 5 children but oh the benefits. I will take my 5 children any day over a clean house, the laundry being done, good meals being cooked, all those papers being organized, etc. I will want my children to look back on their childhood and remember the time I spent with them, I know they will never remember if our house was immaculate. Many people have commented "I just don't know how you do it." and I have to admit that I don't do it, it is the Lord walking beside me and leading me along the way. Also the question is asked "Is this it for you?" and I have to reply "I don't know." only the Lord can say. I would be content if God chose to close up my womb and Joanna was the last child, but I also don't want to miss anything that God chooses to bless me with. I pray that God will be glorified in our family either way. OK, so my confession might be that it is a challenge to mother 5 kids, homeschool, be a wife and find time to be with the Lord, but every day with Jesus is sweeter than the day before!! :)